How I Ruined My Hair




You don't think I'm actually going to show you, do you?


It all started last week in Arkansas when Clarissa, my parents' helper, "made me over." It looked pretty good. I liked it. It was a little greasy, though, just between us, dear reader. But whatever.


My regular hairdresser was actually unable to replicate this look. Not enough gooey stuff, the way I saw it. So today I went out and bought multiple slimy hair products, not to mention a small flat iron (I already have a big one) like the one Clarissa used, and an actual curling iron, which I threw in for good measure.


One of the directions listed (I don't usually read these of course) says NEVER USE THIS PRODUCT WHILE ASLEEP.

Frankly, I wish I had the mental capability to be able to do that. I wonder who does. It would be great if I could accomplish household tasks while I slept. Sort of like some of those childbirth amnesiac drugs that make you forget everything that happens.




Or mabe just smoking a big doobie. Is that what they call it these days? I'm not in the classroom right now, so I can't ask anyone.



I wasn't really going for this look.





Or this one either.
I think I've already had this style, haha.
In other news, the new book is coming along. The fat guy character is getting all the funny lines, wouldn't you know. And my character Mrs. Greer (from the abandoned old lady book) is appearing now in this new one. That's the fun part about being God, you can move 'em around any way you want.
Hope your week is going well, dear reader. Oh yeah, so how does my hair look? It's frizzy AND slimy, the best of both worlds! Yeah! And a non-dairy whipped topping too.
Maybe I should have put that in there.
Living the Dream,
love,
Becky

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