Lessons Learned in 2008




First and always, feel the joy. Be open to it.
And then....


1) SHOES MATTER.
For the first time in my life, I traveled to Europe, both London and Paris. Uncomfortable shoes can severely impair the joy. You won't be able to walk five miles a day in these.

They look good, though, don't they? I reluctantly agree that it is NOT better to look good than to feel good, at least not in every situation. We Americans, or maybe it's just American women, have an inordinate fear of wearing the wrong shoes and, well, looking like an American.


I especially, who wear $5 canvas boat shoes from WalMart, feel this challenge and take it to heart. But the day I snuck on the boat shoes and walked from County Hall on the Thames all the way to St. Paul's was liberating. I could have kept going all the way to Oxford. In Paris, my choices were uncomfortable boots, uncomfortable shoes and the hastily stowed away boat shoes again. Don't look too closely at the photo of me at the Louvrah or you will see what my choice was that day.

2) SHOES DON'T MATTER
Women always think that things would have gone better if "only I'd worn cuter shoes." I'm going to settle this once and for all. No. They wouldn't have. And while we're on the subject, here's the thing about emotions in general.
Your emotions are like your gall bladder. They're in there. They're real. They're right alongside your gall bladder, as a matter of fact and you might as well think of them that way. Too many people try to deny their emotions. Well of course I love Charlie. He's my boyfriend, isn't he? [I'M REALLY GETTING BORED WITH CHARLIE AND I CAN'T STAND THE WAY HE PICKS HIS NOSE] That guy Ricky? I don't care about him. [I WILL DRIVE FIFTEEN MINUTES OUT OF MY WAY TO TRY AND RUN INTO RICKY AND MY HEART BEATS A LITTLE FASTER WHEN I SEE HIM, ESPECIALLY WHEN STUPID CHARLIE IS WITH ME] Admit the truth, whatever it is. You will feel much much better and probably your gall bladder will too.
Now I'm not saying you should say this stuff out loud at Hannaford's or even to your friends. I'm saying you admit it to yourself and maybe a close friend. I'm fearful. I'm angry. Whatever it is. As long as you are honest with yourself, you can keep up the false pretense that you need to in public. Are you with me, dear reader? Are you scratching your head?

3) WORK MATTERS.

It's important to do good work. It's important to do work in general. I hate not doing work. But.....

4) WORK DOESN'T MATTER.
Some kinds of work, like washing windows, will be there forever. What's the point?

And so what have I learned? A thing is true and yet so is the opposite. Excuse me while I run outside and bang my head on a tree. Hopefully, I will deter a squirrel from trying to enter a house where there is too much thinking. I end today with what was for me a truly amazing sight. It's blue just for this year, dear reader. Can you guess what it is? love,b
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