obama us and tattoos

At this time in the semester, I am deluged with excuses. Buried. Swamped. They (the authors)are always very sorry.

"Dear Professor Motew,
I am so sorry for missing class. I am extremely sorry to bother you. I am sorrier than I can say for my miserable existence.."
OKAY, OKAY, WE'RE SORRY. OUR HEADS ARE BOWED. GET ON WITH IT.
"I know I wasn't supposed to miss any more class, but when I woke up on Tuesday, I had terrible stomach pains and panic attacks. My roommate said I looked awful, although it could have been the fact that I was out till 4 and plastered out of my mind."
YES MAYBE IT COULD HAVE BEEN THAT.
"I was wondering if you could tell me if I missed anything."
NO, YOU MISSED NOTHING. NOTHING OF THE LEAST VALUE WAS UTTERED IN CLASS. YOU WERE FAR BETTER OFF AT HOME HUNG OVER--AND MAY I USE THAT AS A BOOK TITLE?
"Is there any assignment?"
DO THE WORDS "CHECK THE SYLLABUS" MEAN ANYTHING TO YOU? DO YOU HAVE THE SLIGHTEST UNDERSTANDING OF WHAT THAT MEANS?
"Again I am very very sorry for all of this."
NO PROBLEM.

There are lots and lots of variations on this theme. Sometimes they say there has been a death in the family, but they don't say who it is. I don't mean to be rude, but this makes me wonder if it is the dog. Or they say they have "stuff" going on. Oh of course--stuff! Why didn't you say so?

"It was a wonderful accomplishment and to me felt like winning the gold metal."

"I was leaning over the bed in dyer pain."

[hairdressers experience this if a color goes really bad]

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