A: Honey?
B: Yes, dear?
A: Did you remember to turn off the oven?
B: Aren't there like twelve employees at our house who can do that?
A: No one knew you were toasting Pop Tarts. It's probably still on.
B: Yeah, so? When was the last time someone made dinner at our house?
A: Is that a dig?
B: No, of course not.
A: A slam against me?
B: Jesus. No.
A: Is it? Because I can take this opportunity to go off with John Mayer. You can have HIS date. Haha.
B: Very funny, darling.
A: You probably have secret plans to meet her anyway.
B: Oh, right. No, of course not.
A: I don't know if I believe you.
JA: Honey?
JM: Yeah. Hi! Hey, man.
JA: Are you listening to me?
JM: Yeah. God, man, long time no see. How ya doin'?
JA: Did you think I looked good when I stood up there?
JM: Oh yeah. Definitely. Hey, how are you? Good to see you.
JA: Do you think Brad felt just a little pang? Don't you think I'm a couple of pounds thinner than she is?
JM: I'd say so. Dude! Vanity Fair party--I'm there!
JA: I think my skin might be a little better.
JM: Hey man, order me a drink, okay?
Robin: You are such an asshole.
Sean: Shut the fk up.
Robin: You didn't even thank me in your speech. Why am I even here with you?
Sean: Cause you're using my credit card, you bitch.
Robin: Look how happy everybody else is.
Sean: Life is good, baby, and it will be better after our divorce.
Robin: I can't count on you for anything.
Sean: I'm a great actor. You can count on me for that.
Robin: Oh yeah. You probably left the oven on too.
Sean: That's cause I'm hoping you'll put your head in it.
Still fantasizing about the 81st Oscars, dear reader. Feel the joy.
A bientot
love,
becky
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