Horoscopes R Us
Pick one:
1)Your planets are aligned perfectly this month for career advancement. Ask for that raise, suggest that idea, and move forward with confidence. This could be the year for you. The secret in your heart, the one that's been burning bright? There will never be a better time to try and act on that. Go ahead and attend that Surprise! New Gender! home sales party and order to your heart's content from the catalogue. It's a month for indulgence, luxury, and Dove bars. Love is in the air too. Your Mercury is set to submit to Venus in a very pleasurable way.
2) Your planets are aligned in a screwy way this month, dude. In fact, a couple of yours are set to collide and it could get ugly. Frankly, I wouldn't get out of bed. But if you do, money matters are really on a bad course. We're talking foreclosure, bankruptcy, and lawsuits. Pull those covers up. And as for love, see ya, wouldn't wanna be ya. Disappointment, heartache, and despair, the Blessed Trinity are all yours this month. You might want to think about trimming that ear hair.
Okay, okay, I'll stop. But gosh, they are fun to write and to read. I'm always hoping they will be just a tad more specific. "Bet 6 and 12 on Keno." "Rte 290 will be a bitch today." "That guy at Dunkin' Donuts likes you, but stay away because he's a worthless deadbeat." When I was a kid, I thought it would be great fun to review restaurants because you'd get to eat out all the time. Then later I thought it would be ideal to demonstrate mattresses in store windows and sleep all day (what an ambitious gal I was!). But now? Horoscope preparation entices me the most.
Potential titles for nun book (the real one is on the list):
Peace out
Weirdness of the heart
The Manual Virgin
Handsome Man Day
Partial Yoga
Here’s the Truth
Weirdness of the heart
The Manual Virgin
Handsome Man Day
Partial Yoga
Here’s the Truth
Twenty Nights
And here's someone who has the brightest of futures:
A bientot, dear reader.
love,
becky
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