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Zest lifts off. First it isn't there and then it is. It builds to a crescendo, which for me usually ends Friday night sometime. Everything feels better when under its influence. GOING UP!!!!

The New Age exterminators are coming tomorrow morning. We're going to meditate on the squirrels and sort of WISH they wouldn't be there. Personally, I'd prefer heavy doses of poison, but whatever. As long as it works.

I should be able to get completely caught up on all my papers this weekend. GOSH, that will feel good. It's a constant intake and output, this process and the one good thing about it is how good I will feel on the very last day. Talk about zest--that's more like delirium. Unfortunately, it leads directly into Christmas preparations, which for me are agonizing and I do nothing but bitch and complain. I'm skilled at both of those. Most of my friends and I have given up exchanging gifts, so my burden is lighter at least by that much. But there is still plenty to be done and bought and planned for. Soon I will post my annual message on why Christmas sucks. This is always a festive day here at CFTE and refreshments are commonly served.

Speaking of food, I am at a serious plateau in my weight loss. I MUST get to my High School Weight by the end of the year. Surely I will, won't I? I'm starting to have doubts. My body and its various parts, which have always yearned to weigh 200 pounds, are making their ultimate last stand. WE'RE NOT DROPPING ANY MORE WEIGHT AND THAT'S FINAL. EVEN IF YOU STARVE US. WE'LL LIVE ON ALL THOSE DORITOS FROM FORMER YEARS. IF YOU DREAM ABOUT FOOD, WE'LL LIVE ON THAT. YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF US.

Grrrrrrrrrrrr.

Anger can be felt through zest sometimes. Zest acts like Demerol--it dulls the pain.

Be here now.

A bientot

becky

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